Triathlon

When you enter a pet store, stick a fish, a hamster, and a parakeet up your ass and see which one gets out first.



triathlon
One of the best and most addicting forms of competition consisting of swimming, cycling, and running all at varying degrees of distances. Triathlon is not for the weak, for it puts the athlete in an undescribeable amount of pain, but when the race is over, you want to do it again. Anyone who downplays the difficulty of a triathlon or the classification of it as a sport should be beaten.
Example:
I did my first triathlon last summer, and I have since been addicted.


triathlon
a modern endurance sport, consisting of swimming, cycling and running, in that order.
Example:


triathlon
Any night of sexual activity consisting of the entire trifecta of penetrating sexual acts. The official order consist of oral, vaginal, and finally anal sex. However, if used as "we might as well have pulled a triathlon" it's understood the acts were there, but not the order.

A reverse triathlon would simply be the acts in reverse order.
Example:
If I really like the guy I let him run the triathlon on me, but no one is going backwards on me, that's just dirty.


Spanish Triathlon
An athletic endurance competition for couples comprising of three consecutive events. The two participants usually engage in the first two events, drinking & eating simultaneously over lunch or dinner. This is always then followed by no less than 36 hours of nonstop sexual intercourse with only brief pauses for the periodic consumption of more food and drink.

Originally inspired by the legendary Ironman Triathlon held every year in Hawai'i consisting of a 2.4 mile (3.9 km) swim, 26.2 mile (42.2 km) marathon run and 112 mile (180 km) bike race. Its current usage however has come to be a reflection & demonstration of the legendary sexual prowess of the normal Hispanic male or female.
Example:
Joe: Hey Luis! Wanna come to the beach with us this weekend?
Luis: Sorry man, I'm preparing Allison for her first Spanish Triathlon beginning this Friday night.
Joe: Oh shit dude, you're a total fucking Ironman!
Luis: Please save it Joe, I'm just getting started. Just wait till I really decide to break her in half!


jewish triathlon
A misnomer, this social activity consists of three elements - whirlpool, sauna, steam room. The jewish triathlon frequently occurs at luxury gyms in large, urban areas.
Example:
Those guys aren't here to workout. They're here to pickup women and go for the gold in a jewish triathlon.


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