as a friend

means you can buy me things, put up with my bullshit, but you ain't getting laid.



as a friend
The three words that let you know that your (near) intimate relationship has come to an end. Usually delivered from female to male, it is the defining phrase that lets the "dropped" individual finally know that it is OVER.
Example:
Donna told him gently, "Dave, you know that I have always been very fond of you; but, now, I want to continue our relationship as just a friend."


as a friend
Used to "soften the blow" when you're about to be frank with someone about their lesser qualities, or when giving advice they might not want to hear.
Example:
"I'm telling you as a friend: If you're going on a date, you should take her out to to a restaurant, because your cooking really stinks."

"I'm telling you as a friend, you really shouldn't be drinking that much! I'm worried about you!"


as a friend
Used to draw the "no sex/physical intimacy" boundaries. Generally used for people who have an agreeable personality but no sex appeal. A nice way of saying "I could never get on you."
Example:
I know we've been dating a lot, but I just like you as a friend.


as a friend
Bullshit response you get from girls/guys when they reject you after asking them out, only to be left sitting on your couch watching the TV thinking "Wait... That doesn't even make sense..."
Example:
"She likes me...
As a friend
Shes loves me...
As a friend
Shes Crazy about me!!!
As a friend! As a friend!"


as a friend
Here's the scoop, boys and girls. Women pidgeonhole men into two categories, Friend and Jerk. Men who are chivalrous, polite, sophisticated, etc. are instantly relegated to "Friend" status. Men who treat women like shit are "Jerks."

Women love Friends but consider them unfuckable because they are not masculine enough. Women hate Jerks because they are asswipes but fuck them anyway. Thus, every woman in the world fucks Jerks and then complains to her Friend about how badly the Jerk treats her.
Example:
Just more proof that women are totally irrational.


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