earley

Earley is named after the great Jarrod Earley, pioneer of our times. To do an Earley means to faint or pass out in order to get yourself out of a tricky situation, most commonly an exam, but could be any random situation



Earley
To hook up with or take advantage of an intoxicated or otherwise impaired female while being sober.
Origin unknown, but it is believed to originate from the name of someone who frequented this practice.
Example:
She was wasted, but he hadn't had a drop to drink. He definitely pulled an Earley.


Aidan Earley
Aidan Earley is a really great guy, works for the good of others. Aidan Earley's mind is set on things out of this world and into the next.
Example:
person 1: Why does Aidan Earley always have others in mind? Aidan Earley girfts shares to shareholders?
person 2: Aidan Earley is out of this world, he is thinking of the world to come. he is fighting for truth and justice.


Aidan Earley
A type of man who does nothing but speak truth and reveal the truth but gets constantly hounded by liars and jealous people accusing him of lies - if not eithier of these, it can only be concluded that these accusators are stupid.

can be found inside the stock markets if isnt being investigated by false accusations from the FCA, who may even be corrupt in themselves.
Example:
Aidan Earley is a good person with an reputaion of being unusually honest, kind and incredibly intelligent when it would be so much easier to follow the crowd.


Earley Horse
An intense cramp suffered by Earl Pickles when he has not stretched himself. Earley Horses commonly occur in the legs but can appear anywhere on the body. The only known cure is intense stretches. They are hard to treat and only Earl knows how. If you feel a cramp coming on with an intense force, chances are you got yourself and Earley Horse. Watch out! It will kick you!
Example:
Earl: Oh no, I should have warmed up big time. I've got a terrible Earley Horse! (groaning) Owww.

Clyde: An Earley Horse? I know how you get those. Somebody didn't stretch!

Earl: Yeah, I forgot to. I was so busy with a bunch of other stuff that I just clean forgot. Now I'm paying for it.

Opal: You poor thing. Earley Horses really hurt, don't they?

Earl: Yes. But I bet I could still stretch it. (he stretches himself) Wow! That felt good. But its still cramping some.

Opal: Here, use my honey lotion. How about if I massage your leg with this? That would get the cramp out. (she starts massaging him) Easy now, let it work.

Clyde: How about we go for a walk, just you and me? But remember the warm up stretches! You don't want another Earley Horse.

Earl: They don't come on by force, but I sure love my Earley Horse!


Justin Earley
A man who has fucked another mans girlfriend while on copious amounts of LSD. His brain is rotted to shit, but he only reads the best of the best books. Like mythology. He is no libtard, but he has become a retard (mentally handicapped) from all of the marijuana he smokes on a hourly basis. He uses women for sex, money and drugs to fulfill the hole in his rotting heart of a former human being that once was charming, beautiful, could make you fall for him in seconds by being a total flirt, and humorous. His doped up brain with copious amounts of holes from LSD makes him believe wholeheartedly that he is the anti-christ, and he can do whatever he wants. Rather it’s bragging, making bank on shitty pot brownies, or using more, and more drugs, and more, and more women (also he probably does cocaine). He try’s to erase his past identity with a Nazi sounding name, “Cedric” to cover up his past wrong doings, and to mask his former self (which was a tolerable, and slightly respectable person).
Example:
“Dude Cedric makes such good music!!”

“No man, I think you mean Justin Earley”

“Yoooo... wasn’t that the guy who cucked this dude on purpose?”

“Yeah... it’s cuz he’s doped up all the time so we HAVE to feel bad for him.”


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