morning wood

A morning erection that is naturally caused as the brains enters the REM-deep sleep phase. At this stage, the body's skeletal muscle structure relaxes and causes hypervasodilation in the capillaries of the body, resulting in said erection.



morning wood
Your dicks way of saying "Hey, you've ignored me for 8 hours, now i'm going to make you piss all over your feet"
Example:
I got morning wood, and mom didn't see it, so she gave me a hug and got a suprise.


morning wood
Perhaps one of the greatest of God's creations, but at the same time the worst. It all depends on the circumstances. When the body goes into REM sleep, capillaries go into hyper vasodilation, and thus the penis becomes goes in one of the most intense and hardest erections a man can experience.
Example:
TEACHER: Tommy!? You're late again! Care to explain!?
TOMMY: You want the truth?
TEACHER: Yes!
TOMMY: OK, here it goes. For the past few mornings, I've woken up with some gnarly morning wood, and to waste something is a sin; so, I took full advantage of the situation each time.

DAN: Dude, what's up? You sick or something?
JAKE: No, man. I slept naked last night, and slept in this morning to the point where my mom came into my room and threw the sheets off of me. I had massive morning wood, dude, and she saw it. AWKWARD!!!


morning wood
when you wake up in the morning with an erection. is exceptionally poor if you are wearing gym shorts, because you usually have to stay in bed for a few minutes while it goes down if you have other people in your house, and generally sticks straight out, not following up your body like normal wood.
Example:
i couldnt get out of bed for a few minutes this morning because i had morning wood and it wouldnt go down


morning wood
When a person (preferably a man) wakes up in the morning in an upside-down "T" position. Characterized by the largest, possibly most embarrasing erection ever to be witnessed. Also called "morning glory" and "pitching a tent." Ways of getting rid of morning wood include: counting to 100, visualizing your grandmother in a string bikini, and challenging youreslf to a friendly game of horseshoes (ringtoss if no horseshoes are readily available).
Example:
MOM: "Billy, wake up! Time to go to school."
BILLY: "God, mom, How many times have I told you to knock?!?"
MOM: "Goodness Billy, why did you pitch a tent inside your bed?"
BILLY: "I didn't mom. It's my morning wood. Now get out!!!"


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